Fun, again
Cubs are in. Cathy's happy. Cathy's VERY happy. This is Cathy at the last home game of the season. She's happy, can you tell? Wow. Happy. That's a new concept. This summer, my main goal was to have fun. Selfish, huh. The last three summers have been extremely difficult and painful. As we all know. Summer of 04, leading up to Lou's diagnosis, was not good. We all walked around on eggshells, scratching our heads wondering what was wrong. Didn't get to alot of games that year. Didn't have alot of fun. At all. Then the next two summers........well, no need to go there, now. So THIS summer, I had one main objective: have fun. Simple huh. It's not so simple when you are no longer used to it. It's not so simple when you are surrounded by memories, pictures, and everything else that goes with another life. It's not so simple when you are no longer part of the old couple. You find yourself wondering how to have fun. if you should be having fun. If it's ok to have fun. You think you should be having fun in the old way, the way you used to have fun. You catch yourself having fun and wish you were having fun in your old life. But, I am learning. As you can see. I'm a pretty quick study actually. I figured it out by about August. How to have fun, for real, again. It's possible. Post season baseball helps for sure. With a little luck (no, make that ALOT of luck), I can stretch this out through most of October, maybe. This fun thing. Fun is good. With that thought in mind, I have decided I will be ending the blog at the end of October. It's time. It has served me well. And, I'm hoping it has served others well, too. But I'm trying to have fun now. And, my life is quite full with other, more important things, my dear niece first and foremost. That isn't so much fun, but I"m so glad I can do it, that I can be there for her. The fun I've had is helping me to help her, now, I think. She lost her mom when she was 12. Her step mom is pretty far away. I"m so glad to be near. She's like a daughter to me. So, I'm on to new missions I guess. Life. Guess that's what it is. I'm going to try to pull out the "greatest hits" from this blog during the month of October. Just a few. To remind us, to leave with you. Thanks for reading. Thanks for being there. GO CUBS!
posted by CB | 9:12 AM
11 Comments:
What an awesome picture! Love that happy smile!!!
xoxox,
t
Wonderful post! Cubs can't lose with fans like that..
And once again you write what is difficult to say.
You've made it a much better place.
The sun is just coming up here, and I think you're right, this may be a fun month..
Left Coast Friend
How wonderful Cathy. I am glad fun has entered your life again -- that is what it should be like for such a wonderful person. Keep enjoying life and even if your blog is ending please keep in contact with some of your new made cyber friends. Much Love
I've been a faithful reader for awhile--but have never posted. But now is the time. I want to thank you for the lessons on living--because that is what they have been. You have made me think--sometimes about small things--but when it comes to people, nothing is small. I've thought about how I love--and how I relate. And sometimes your post has changed my day. And I'm so grateful for what you have shared. My thought process is different. You're a stranger to me--but you've made a difference. I've grown. I'm grateful. And I'm humbled by your honesty.
Cathy!
Fun!! I love that word. AND my favorite thing to do is laugh. I like it so much that I made that my New Year's Resolution this year. My Resolution is to make sure I have at least one belly laugh a day. I haven't reached that goal- but I am trying ;-) Last night my daughter said something very funny I had a good belly laugh and I felt SO good afterward!
I am glad you are having fun! Try the one belly laugh a day. It does wonders!!! Love, Lisa
Cathy,
It's so good to see your smile! I read every entry and I love them all, happy and sad. You have shared so much of yourself with us, many of us who don't even know you but care so much. Thank you. I'm sad to think I won't be able to come here and read new entries anymore, but happy for you that YOU'RE happy and moving forward. Thanks for sharing your journey with us.
Emily in Iowa
I have also followed your blog for many months and have never commented. Your writing has made me laugh, cry, think, smile, and believe in the power of love. While I'm sorry to see this blog end I am glad that it has served it's purpose and I am so glad that you are starting to have fun. Most importantly right now, my thoughts and prayers are with your niece ... I am a 40 yo mother of two (4 and 2) and I can't imagine what she is going through right now. My best ... and thank you!
Cath...and Cheri...Still trying for the weekend in November. They've been giving me the runaround and my mom's out camping. I'm TRYING!!! Hugs.
Dear Cathy,
It is with sorrow and happiness that I read this message...."Lou's Lessons" through YOU....have been such an inspiration to me. You articulate so well the feelings that we all have but can't quite put into words sometimes. I do hope we can keep in touch. I joined a new bereavement group through hospice just this week and our "homework" assignment was to do something nice for ourselves this week....goes along with your idea of "having fun", I guess....but sometimes that is so very hard to do. You give me HOPE!!
Love, Sharon
Cath - I have read all your posts and unfortunately never posted back to you. Lessons from Lou has been a gift from you to so many and for me a life changing experience. Your advice along the way as your journey unfolded woke me up to grabbing my life with my girls more completely and I am so grateful to you. You look so happy in the pic and I am thrilled to see it - you deserve it. Whatever you do next I hope it includes writing because you are an amazing writer with an abiity to touch many inprofound ways.
Take care my fiend . . .love, Joyce
Cathy,
We were list buddies on the big list and I have kept up with your blogs, sometimes walking in your shadow thru cyberspace as you blogged along finding your way. I am happy for you that the sun finally seems to be peeking through the clouds for you.
God Bless you, Cathy and the boys.
I will miss your blogs...
Lois
Jade28@comcast.net
W/O Mike 6/01/46~3/03/03 gbm
A/O Tommy 1/20/94~1/18/05 medullo
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