September 11

September 11, 2001 looked exactly like this September 11. The day was crystal clear, sunny, bright blue skies, with the beginning of fall in the air. The night before, I had been at a Cubs game with work buddies. It was a perfect evening. Same incredible weather. And the Cubs won. I can remember, very clearly, an associate saying, "it doesn't get any better than this, does it". We all agreed, it doesn't. A pefect night, good friends, baseball. I t doesn't get much better than that. And then came the next day. September 11, 2001. Everything changed, didn't it. It started out normal enough. I tell this story because it says so much about Lou, about the kind of husband and father he was. He had an out of town business trip that day. He left home at around 6 am. for his flight I think. We never left each other without a proper goodbye. We learned that BEFORE 9/11. 6 a.m is just a tad early for me, so I went back to sleep until 7:00. I think I took Damon to school at 7:30, and returned home to get ready for work. For some reason, I had a morning talk show on tv. I NEVER HAVE THE TELEVISION ON IN THE MORNING, EVER. I am not sure why I did that day. But I did. And so, I learned about it, just as everyone else did, as it was unfolding. At first, I was a little confused, like I think we all were, not really comprehending what was happening. I watched it over and over, like we all did. Then it hit me. Lou was on a plane. Somewhere. He was going to Cleveland. East. I started hyperventilating. Was it possible his plane could have diverted to New York? Cleveland is enroute to NY from Chicago. I got very panicky. I had no idea if his plane had landed or not. It was due to land at around 8:30 I think. I didn't know what to do. The panic I felt was compounded by the fact that I was standing next to the window in the very tall building I live in. All of a sudden, I had to get out of there. All I knew was that planes were crashing into tall buildings and I had to get out of the one I live in. At that time, my office was very close to home. I ran all the way there. I felt better there. The group who went to the game the night before had gathered. They were from downstate and wanted to head home. Another one was from Boston. He didn't make it home until much later that week. I still didn't know the status of Lou's plane. Of course, the phone lines were crazy. We all just stood there in front of a television, frozen. Then the building announced that we all had to evacuate. They pretty much evacuated all of downtown if I remember correctly. My apartment building included. I HAD NOWHERE TO GO!!! But that wasn't my main concern. I had to find out about Lou's plane. This all sounds like it was hours, but it was really only something like a half hour. As I was leaving the office building, my cell rang. It was Lou. I still remember hearing his voice that day. He didn't know why I was so elated to hear from him. He called the minute he landed and still had not heard what was going on. He had landed in Cleveland after being put in a holding pattern for awhile. When they landed, the airport was in lockdown. No one on the plane knew what had happened. The airport was alerted to the possiblity of a plane heading in that direction. It was the plane that went to Pennsylvania. Lou said the airport was chaotic, to say the least. But the most chaotic part was trying to figure out what to do next. Obviously, he would not be getting on a plane back home that day. The car rental place was insane with people trying to get home he said. I wanted him home. I didn't want to be alone that day . Alone in our tall building. I knew Damon would want Lou home. Drew was away at school. Lou had a reservation for a car to get to his meeting, but it was impossible to get anywhere near the car rentals. After waiting for a long time, somehow, he managed to get a car. A few hours after he landed, he was able to start driving home. I think its a 6 - 8 hr drive. I went to a friends house for the rest of the day. Damon joined us after school. Lou arrived at around 6pm. I can remember how happy I was that he had made it. That he had persisted in getting a car, somehow. I can remember feeling safe, then. Lou wanted to go home. Damon was afraid to, I think. Lou told him if the president was in the White House, we could certainly be in our apartment. He was right, of course. He always made everything allright. That night, I felt very vulnerable sleeping in our room with the view of Lake Michigan. I kept envisioning planes. It took me awhile to get over it. I drove poor Lou crazy about it. He was the president of the condo association and knew alot about the building. I questioned everything about our safety. He checked it all out. Every little worry I had. And those worries were so dumb! After awhile, the worries went away. Life resumed, didn't it. What I guess I learned that day, is that anything can happen. And we only have this day. So cliche, I know, but I guess it sunk in that day. No sense worrying about tomorrow. Sometimes, it never comes. Three years later, Lou was diagnosed with the brain tumor. The weather was just like it was on that Sept. 11, just as it is today. A crisp, beautiful, late summer/early fall day. The entire fall was like that, the fall of the diagnosis. It didn't seem right, that the days could be so gorgeous, and things could be so wrong. Anything can happen. On any beautiful day, anything can happen. Cherish the day. Cherish each other. I think it's a great way to honor those who lost their lives.